Friday, January 14, 2011

@_@ BLOWN MIND!

So... what a week so far. It feels like my day can go from super happy fun time too utter fucking shit. Earlier this I was feeling good, I payed of the women I hit, I started feeling like my week would just go swimmingly and then just out of fucking no where something bad happens. I really feel like nothing is going right for me right now...
Lets start talking about the bad news. (this is going to be a nagging post just saying)So lets start out on Wednesday. I got to work and started my ipod and put the songs on shuffle. Out of the 3000+ songs I have it had to be me and my ex's fucking song. So during work I was all fucking depressed and shit and felt like my life is just so fucking lonely. That feeling went through the whole night. I just could get it out of my head how much I loved being with someone. Before meeting my ex I wouldn't have ever felt this(I think). It just feels like their with never be someone for me and my ex was the closes thing to perfect.(which is really wasn't, but love does that) After that I started feeling like my dad, not letting go of the past and moving forward. I really try and forget the past but I really feel I fucked up. I then started to try and think of why it would never work and why it was for the best. That helped alittle bit, but still feels bad man.
more later... maybe

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